Excuses for not going? I hear them all the time in my role as Director of Mobilization for Crossworld. In spite of valid fears, the unreached people of the world are too important to let anything keep you from going to them. Let’s look at four of these common fears and how to overcome them.

Fear #3: Fear of Family

The conversation often begins like this: “I committed myself to missions but my family ….”
The fear of family can express itself in two ways:

1. Fear of putting immediate family members in harm’s way overseas.
2. Fear of hurting or disappointing extended family members moving overseas.
If either of these fears wins, these disciple-makers will remain close to home. Here are three steps to overcome this fear.

For The Immediate Family

1. Address Your Concern

It is a reality … Your family may suffer in various forms, but not outside the will of God.

Process the reality of your concern and work through it with your spouse, your church leadership and a mission mobilizer. Understanding what processes are in place provides as much security as possible. The cost is a great one, but God is worthy. Faithful is He who has called you.

2. Accept the Reality of the Cost

One or all of your immediate family members may contract a disease, suffer as the result of men, or even be put to death. None of us want to see our loved ones suffer. But these potential realities must be understood in the light of God’s sovereignty over all things. The same God who is able to protect me at home is more than able to protect me in a foreign land.

The reality is that geographic location has nothing to do with His ability to protect. The safest place to be is to be living in obedience.

John Piper wrote in A Call for Christian Risk, “When a Christian says from the heart, ‘To live is Christ and to die is gain,’ he is free to love no matter what …. To every timid saint, wavering on the edge of some dangerous gospel venture, Jesus says, ‘Fear not, you can only be killed.’”

3. Affirm Your Commitment

If God has led you to serve among the least-reached and the fear of placing your family in harm’s way raises its head, then reaffirm your commitment by expressing that fear to God and by spending time in His Word. Beginning to acknowledge His sovereign protection over your daily life now will help you later.

For the Extended Family

1. Acknowledge their concern

It’s very important to include your extended family early on in the decision-making process.

Their feelings and concerns are legitimate and need to be acknowledged. However, these feelings and concerns must be balanced with your obedience to Christ. You honor your family by honoring God. Acknowledge the reality of their concerns and desires but press on!

Work through this issue with your extended family, your church leadership and a mission mobilizer to understand how best to move forward in your commitment. (Luke 18:29-30; Proverbs 29:25).

2. Accept the Reality of the Cost

Distance between you and your relatives back home is a reality, but not one to be feared.

With today’s technology, distance is not nearly the sacrifice it was in previous years (though it is still part of the cost). It’s easy to stay connected with family back home, almost to a fault. Technology can be a curse if it keeps you from adapting to the local culture and investing in your relationships.

The family you leave behind won’t stop living when you leave. Family members will marry, children will be born and loved ones may even pass away without you being there. Life will go on. Acceptance of that reality will help you overcome this fear and is vital to your commitment prior to leaving. (Matthew 10:37-39; Matthew 28:19-20; Hebrews 13:5).

3. Affirm Your Commitment

If God has led you to make disciples among the least-reached, affirm that commitment by using it as the filter for all decision-making.

Ann Hasseltine, wife of Adoniram Judson, wrote a close friend concerning her marriage proposal. She said, “I have … come to the determination to give up all my comforts and enjoyments here, sacrifice my affection to relative and friends, and go where God, in His Providence, shall see fit to place me” (To the Golden Shore).

The fear of family should never keep a follower of Christ from going to the nations! No more should these words come out of your mouth: “My family is not supportive of my decision to go” or “I just cannot put my spouse and my children in harm’s way.” It’s time to conquer this fear and to trust God’s Sovereignty over all things in our lives, in order to see His glory shine among the nations!

Read the series
Part 1: The Fear of Funding
Part 2: The Fear of Fear
Part 3: The Fear of Family
Part 4: The Fear of Failure

Mark Silvers served with Crossworld in the Philippines for 10 years and joined the home office staff as Director of Mobilization in 2009. Mark’s driving passion is the goal of reaching the the 2.9 billion people in the world today with no access to the gospel. Reply to Mark.